So here I sit ingesting bean soaked water
Worrying about was has not happened
Worrying about was has happened without me

Something other than lack of sleep is tugging at my gut
Something other than the caffeine is making my insides shake
Can I bring these feelings, this discord within time into balance?
Will sleep itself bring a new day? Or will the cracks and fissures made before sunset still exist at sunrise?

Water that has flowed past the dock cannot be drawn in
Life cannot be balanced as easily as a see saw

Peace may be my ultimate desire, but have I fostered it?
Am I reaping what I have sown or am I attempting to harvest more than I have planted?

Lord bring Shalom.
Use this broken vessel.

Continue to remind me in these dark chaotic moments that through this knowlegde that I can find peace through your Son.